I got opinions.

The saying goes that a broken clock is right twice a day. The idea is right, but the actual mechanics are wrong, depending on circumstances. A clock that’s stuck between two and three and is an old style analog may be right between one and three times a day, depending on daylight savings time. A digital clock may be right once a day, twice a day, or not at all, depending on those same circumstances.

The phrase “a broken analog clock is right between one and three times a day depending on what time it constantly shows and the presence of daylight savings time changes” isn’t catchy, though. The phrase “A broken clock is right an average of twice a day” is better, if not wholly accurate, but the point gets across.

The point, of course, is that something that lacks all function, that simply does not work and has no purpose will still be right regularly.

Glenn Beck has been right once a year at the high end. He has less function than that which is totally without function. He’s actually managed to take functionality into a full negative.

That’s fairly impressive, I have to admit.

Now, there’s a pretty good amount of deal-a-day sites since Woot decided to come into existence and be totally awesome. And it’s easy to tell when they’re failing, because they run the same crappy items every few days.

Stootsi was no exception, but they sure pushed those foglight decals to the end. And yet, the end has a slight problem.

http://www.stootsi.com/prologue.aspx , specifically.

I know, we don’t speak ill of the dead. I know I’m being too picky, but…shouldn’t that be epilogue?

My art teacher declared “You’ve made amazing progress today, it’s really exciting to watch” today.

Now I know I’m still pretty mediocre on a good day. While I’m super proud to have been complimented, it makes me wonder “How horrible was I two weeks ago?” My most recent drawing is high school journal level stuff, certainly, but does that mean I started at…oh, yes. I’d say “second grade art class” IS about right for where I was.

I guess I’ll be proud and sad at the same time.

I’ve always wondered, of the various creeds and colors of nationalism we don’t allow, we still keep the old Irish terms around in a damn near official capacity. See: paddy wagon. Is it because they were driven by them, filled with them, or most likely both? I admit, I know my recent ancestors, and I have to admit it’s probably both.

But man, nobody else gets this, especially Europeans. Mind, there’s not a lot of stereotypical jobs for the rest, but nobody calls the mechanic a wop shop. The pub’s never the pom parlor or the limey bar. The beer garden isn’t the kraut house.

Then again, it might be that it’s impossible to be Irish and take yourself seriously. Maybe there just wasn’t any protest because we all stood up and let forth a collective “Eh, ‘ey’s got a right good point there.”

As in “You-Glue.” I wish I was making it up. Because this name is just inexplicable.

Some part of me, some hopeful part with faith in humanity is trying to tell me it’s short for “universal glue.” I doubt it. I think it’s a bastardized “You-glue”, because that sounds like “YouTube” and the kids like that, it’s popular, so maybe they’ll think of our product now!

I wish I didn’t have to think of this, but I know two things. People are stupid, marketers are extra stupid and will latch onto any tiny sliver of what they perceive to be trendy.

It could certainly be both. Not that that makes it better, really, but perhaps it was a marketing afterthought? Oh who am I kidding, marketers have taken over the nation entirely, and here’s the result.

That’s not a bad thing, the way I see it. It’s just hilarious. I’m watching Idiocracy on cable right now, and while the words “fuck you”, “fag”, “faggot”, and “fucker” are all censored. Fleeting expletives especially, which have previously gotten some protection, are censored.

Yet written on screen in bright letters, the unprotected sexual usage of the word fuck is used, for “Buttfuckers” restaurant.

Maybe we should just stop being so stupid as to censor in the first place, but if we’re going to do it, maybe we shouldn’t get it hilariously wrong?

Then again, maybe the network went with the premise of the movie and assumed the audience is filled illiterate ‘tards.

A new, limited edition scent from Glade. Now, I thought this might be a contradiction at first. Kashmir is a mountainous region, afterall, but looking up some pictures actually shows there’s some lovely forest areas. So I suppose it could be a proper scent, being an actual place.

But that aside, do you really want the house to smell like goat?

Both because I love them, and because they get tons of vacation time. Is it just me, or do TDS and Colbert get as much time off as they do on? Is it a necessity? I know big news always seems to happen as soon as they take a break, are they doing it so Republicans will go crazy and give them something to write? Or is the work just that exhausting?

All I know is I want it.

The school website/bookstore referral lists two required books for one of my classes. Being both required, I bought both (on amazon for an extreme discount of course).

It’s the same book.

One is a hardbound copy, one is loose leaf. Fortunately enough the looseleaf only cost me $13, I can sell it off easily enough. But the titles are different and suggest that it’s a study guide/expansion. And seeing as nobody has a picture of it, you never know until you get the damn thing. All you know is that the school and bookstore list both as required.

Fuck you, textbook companies! This villainy shall not stand!

No, really, I must.

Well, maybe not.

All I know is the downside of going to Mesa Community College is that holy crap do I sneeze a lot. I’ll get used to it I’m sure, I always have, but something in Mesa always gets my allergies up, especially at MCC. Maybe it’s a flower in the area. Or maybe I just have an allergy to concentrated Mormonism and irrational wholesomeness/homophobia.