Entries Tagged 'religion' ↓

So, here’s the problem I’m running into. All the true Christians go to Heaven during the Rapture. Wouldn’t the truly Christian thing be to stay behind and help your fellow man achieve salvation during the tribulations, or to at the very least ease his suffering as the Bible says you should? Sure it’s a little Boddhisatva, but I bet Jimmy Carter would stick around and build houses just the same. The people who want to be Raptured aren’t true Christians, and therefore wouldn’t get taken straight up to Heaven. Those who would be Raptured won’t be, because they’d choose to stay behind and be Christ-like, which is the essence of Christianity.

Ergo, even if there’s a Rapture, there won’t be a Rapture. That and there’s no biblical support for it whatsoever. You know, that too.

1) I can’t figure out why Vegemite, delicious mana of the gods, has never caught on anywhere outside of Australia. It’s fucking delicious.

2)I can’t figure out why people are so god damn dumb as to flip out over the fact it has a Halal sticker now. Are Muslims not supposed to enjoy things? Do people think there was some big change to the formula just by adding a sticker? Do they think that stickers indicating food as Halal are some kind of secret tax, and you have to run ‘em all under an Imam’s prayers? Or is it that people just don’t realize Halal is synonymous with Kosher, and Vegemite’s been both to begin with?

3)Why does this get 5200 people? This is just sad.

Let us suppose that there is an omnipotent God. He has a plan. It’s enforced.

Full predestination.

If that’s true, why make people who aren’t the one true faith, who stay that way? It’s in his power to change, and he did it himself in the first place. Either his plan requires atheists and other people to help improve the world and they get the same ultimate treatment, or he’s just a dick. That would be the only reason to be all-powerful and create beings to do nothing but suffer (and cause suffering). Yes, you’re being a dick when you play The Sims.

But at the end of the day, I’m what God made me, even if that’s a voodoun.

Now let us predestination is not a factor. Let’s assume free will even. God is still omnipotent. God can make or unmake as he sees fit.

So why make or just not unmake everyone else, those that aren’t his flock? It gets back to the same issues. They’re needed and get equal treatment in the afterlife, or he’s a dick. Now the possibility is even raised that God is not omnipotent. He can’t do it.

Now personally, I prefer option one or three. Those are fair enough I figure, but they raise issues for the monotheistic faithful.

One means when you insult and attack people for their religion or lack thereof, you’re questioning God. Start leaving people to be who they are. It’s what God wants.

Three acknowledges that God is not all powerful, and shouldn’t be punishing people for other faiths. He may not even be the only one. Feel free to worship, but stop pushing, please, because clearly it shows there are other options.

Two just means God is a dick. A sadist torturing eternally for his own amusement. Not only a being not worth worshipping but worth rebelling against. One caring little more for followers than a Lovecraftian horror. Cthulhu or Y’golonac effectively. In that case, find a new deity I’d suggest. You worship not from love but fear, and I’m pretty sure that falls under lip service rules.

There’s always option four of God isn’t paying attention and has more to care about. So why should you? Afterall, he made the pagans, buddhists, hindi, atheists, and even satanists. Or doesn’t care enough to change them.

So what’s this all mean? Well, stop worrying about God for one. Enjoy your life, be a decent person because it’s just what you’d want other people to do.

Or go find one with less habits toward megalomania. But even then try to one or more relaxed deities, instead of a cosmic hardass. See above if you’re wondering why.

And of course, stop trying to convert me. See above for why.

But most importantly, don’t be an asshole in the name of God. He probably doesn’t want you you; if it turns out he does, it’s likely a case of option two anyway.

Instead of just before bed, say, or after forgetting the rest of the world exists via Fallout:New Vegas.

So here’s the dumbest thing I’ve read today.

“Who is oboma watching to protect? Within hours of citizens complaints of another mosk being built oboma had his justice department jump at defending the building of another mosk that a community doesn’t want. Even though the people have no chance to over rule its building. Think ing!”

This one came via youropenbook.org, and the profile picture is a picture of another picture. SHOCKER.

How’s it feel to be a terrorist, Terry Jones? That’s the kind of tactic you’re using, threats against a religion or people, in this case to burn a holy book, if you don’t get what you want.

“If they don’t move the ground zero mosque I’m burning korans!” You’re attempting to strongarm someone and violate their first amendment rights because you feel your own supercede them. And it’s not even a mosque. It’s a community center with an open prayer space. OPEN. Any faith, any gender. That alone dictates it’s not a mosque. A mosque, much like any conservative or orthodox jewish temple, is SEGREGATED by sex.

In summary, die in a fire. I hope that if there is a God he starts it with a lightning bolt, but I think if there was one omnipotent deity he’d have struck down Glenn Beck by now, so instead I’ll just go with the fact you’re a terrible person in every sense of the word, and Jesus would hate you.

Rabbi Daniel Lapin just gave an interview on MSNBC, comparing a TV show in development satirizing the life of Jesus to the BP oil spill. He followed up defending this analogy by saying “I’m not a foe of Comedy Central; I love The Man Show, I like the uh, Today Show.”

Man Show, ended in 2004 (2003 if you ask many fans). Today Show-A long running morning show on NBC. You might want to fact-check your bullshit, Rabbi. Especially before commenting that you think it’s unfair that Comedy Central is hesitant to make fun of Muslims due to threats of violence, thus implying you think Christians should threaten violence as well.

Well look who’s back! So fast. This time, I got an email with the subject line “PLEASE SOMEONE KILL STEVE JOBS.” Yes, it’s our batshit friend from before, and a few things I’m noticing. The name is initialed as STD. Heehee. The switch in tone is so rapid and strange that I can’t decide if I should call troll on this, or if we’re talking about the next Timecube. This one is much, MUCH longer than the last one, so I’ll give you a teaser, and the rest is after the cut.

BRITNEY IS MINE!!!

Dear Scientists,
IF YOU DO NOT COMPLY WITH THIS ORDER
YOU WILL BE KILLED SOON.

You as a scientist bare the responsibility to save
humanity, the code to infinity as been cracked and i
am here to give you the data.

Continue reading →

The best part of owning a website isn’t those fat stacks of cash (ha, there aren’t any!), it’s the ridiculous email that finds its way to my inbox.

Enjoy. There’s a link in there to his/her youtube page too, which is also rather batshit, but mostly what you’ve read here.

~ Science Like No Other ~

I have all the secrets of infinity in my hands,
i really want to spread it to as many scientists
as possible. so here i go.

here’s a simple scientific test you can experiement
with.

wear black clothes and go to a busy mall
you will notice your mind really hurts, this
is because black colors ( or dark colors )
are pulling other humans imagination and bringing
them to close to you and you read it.

this causes stress especially when you are
surrounded by religious people or something.

but when you WEAR WHITE CLOTHES..
the opposite is true, you reject everyones idealogy
and you get to feel free with your own science.

your own imagination is not disturbed.

you can optimize and re-test this if you want.
you can even wax the body hair you have
and dye your hair to yellow or white.

trust me, this is extreme science like no other
and i have it cracked, this can be used to
stop aging, reverse aging,

we can use this to time travel, be immortal
and make money too

because infinity’s law suggests the more people
you spread this truth to of, the more money
you are likely to make. ( it’s the reward you
get from infinity for giving people the secret )

so tell people to wear white ( be nice, by force
is prohibited by federal law of infinity ).

or just wear white clothes and walk around
shopping malls, you become a role model
and your influence alone will earn you money.

WHITE as you know is a color that pushes
while BLACK is a color that pulls light.

so imagine if you were made up of light
and you were wearing black clothes.

you’d age faster than anyone else.

if you were wearing white, because it pushes
the light back, you could stop yourself
from aging.

try experiementing this with luxury places
because there is a competition going on, on earth.

it’s as if everyones soul has some jealousy
inside them and they do not like it when
someone is about to spread the truth and rise
into power.

so keep yourself safe, experienment around
luxury stores where your safety is not jeapordized.

if you are a highly scientific person, try avoiding
conversation with highly religious people.

my own great parents are religious, so i am not
talking to them not even on the phone.

their voice and the way they think can interfier
with my imagination and distort the science
i am working on.

please feel free to ask me for more information
i am on youtube right now

youtube.com/summertimedancings
post comments on my channel i’ll respond 24/7
to every question you have.

on my youtube page i found david’s video wow
i really want to give this guy all the secrets i have
he can put it into media, become a billionaire
and spark a revolution that can save us all.

i mean all of us, we are all about to become
immortal supreme beings.

all we have to do is wear white clothes
and be obsessed with white stuff.

very simple.

this is no joke, i am about to get this party started

Summer Time Dance

Woo! Hows about dem subtle racist ideas in there? If you’re not a good aryan you’re absorbing everyone else’s thoughts and feelings! Start bleachin’ that skin to go with the body hair!